For a while now i wanted to spit out my thoughts on SM ( social media, just to be sure you are not thinking about naughty stuff ). Everybody has an opinion on it and how it is so good and how it is so bad but let me just say that like everything in this world it has it's good and bad sides and also some realities that we should first accept in order to make such vehement statements about SM. I co own a marketing agency so due to my job i was required and i am still required to really understand how they work in order to better present them and sell the services to our customers, this just as a side note that i am not talking from a point of no knowledge.
"Sad people are posting a lot on SM" which i think it's in the same family with "People who need validation post a lot on SM". I never understood why we throw around mean assumptions about people's reasoning without even knowing them, just like everything in nowadays everybody is a world renowned psychologist that can pass mental health diagnostics around. If you bring in to the discussion publicly know people ( the influencers ) that actually live from this everybody takes a step back and says yes but that's something different but it seems to me that nobody takes in to account that everybody needs to start from somewhere. So they are not sad or in search of validation, they are just people who have opinions and are really good at creating content and they could really create a career in this. Personal note here is that this people don't know what marketing for a brand means or creating a personal brand, they are just good content creators. You have the type of people who want to brag about what they have so they use SM, you can simply unfollow them if you are not interested and also you could understand that if that person buys an expensive car and park it in front of the restaurant he/she is doing the same thing, if they buy an expensive watch/jewelry and they constantly shake their hand so that you see the bling bling they are doing the same thing, if they buy expensive designer clothing on which the brand is written with huge letters they are doing the same thing. So don't you think that these people just like to brag? You have the people who post pictures only when they are on holyday, are they sad, happy or they just want to show you some beautiful places or the want to brag where they are ? A girl posts bikini pictures, maybe she has an OF (only fans)/video chat/ escort so she is promoting her line of work or she is an exhibitionist. Do you still think she is sad or in search of validation? Maybe somebody is just posting and building their self trust like this because they never got it from anywhere. You have they gym fanatics who post only pictures only from the gym, maybe they are dreaming about becoming a fitness coach or they want to motivate others or maybe that's the only interesting part in their life. Maybe they post interesting stuff that they find on the internet and think their followers would enjoy also, just think about it that without these people you would never find out about anything else outside your bubble. What I am trying to say is that people use SM for different scopes and in my opinion it becomes a condition only in the moment when they are hunting likes and followers, otherwise they are just using SM as that is the main idea to create content find content and too share it otherwise if everybody would stop doing this you would no longer have SM.
The dangers that is see are that people think they know people based on what they post when in fact they only see what they want to share. Nobody lives a fully happy and rich life like they share and you must be aware of that. Don't get influenced by what you see on SM and think that you should be in a way or another. Be inspired by what you see and if it fits you start working on it. Everybody shares their good moments because everybody is scared of showing their bad moments, because nobody wants to see sad stuff. That perfect looking girl/boy uses a tone of filters and edits and each one of us is just perfect in their own way and yes we can become better but because we want to not because we aim for a virtual ideal that is altered.
Just think what a great opportunity is SM to feed you interior artist ( we all have it ) music, painting, writing, photography and so on, just share it without looking for likes in time your tribe will find you. If you don't like what somebody is posting just unfollow them, it's so easy. If you like what somebody is posting follow, like and share. That's how SM works.
NONSENSE that i don't understand about SM:
1. creating fake accounts to stalk on somebody. You are a stalker and this a serious medical condition and you should go see a therapist
2. close friends. Why? you can have your account private and accept as followers only the people you want so why do you have there people who are close and people who you want too see what you are doing and people who you want too see only a part of what you are doing. Are you ok ? you have the power of controlling it in a more mature way. Highschool was such a long time ago.
3. mute. If you simply don't want to see what somebody is posting just use unfollow. And the person that get's unfollowed, GROW THE FUCK UP, it doesn't mean they have a problem with you, it just means that they don't like or they are not interested in what you post. It's like going to a museum you pass by a painting and the painter comes and slaps you because you didn't look at their painting, WTF ?!?
4. and the last one, which is the worst in my opinion. ARCHIVE. So you are hiding pictures/videos from your profile that you don't want other people to see anymore but from time to time you want to look at them. Most people have there most pictures with their exes, so from time to time you want to look at pictures of your exes. From where does this desire to live in the past comes? This reminds me of the time when i wrote about people who still keep pictures with their exes on SM under the reasoning that "they were an awesome person" If they are so awesome why aren't you together anymore ? If you feel the need from time to time to look at pictures of you and your ex together why don't you reach out to them and get back together? You could simply have the pictures on your PC or an external hard drive because OK they are memories but not at hand available in every moment among your favorite pics, when you think about them to have a look. It's simply not healthy. Or if you are still there soul or mind wise, shake your ego and reach out as you will never be able to build something new like this. Spoiler alert for all time travelers sometimes this pics still appear in search and if you waist your time in hiding pictures than make sure your remove your tags from pictures with your exes also ;).
One more note about SM, and you can call this a personal frustration, if you have friends or acquaintances that start a business or they are an artist at the start of the road support them with a view, like, follow, share as trust me this will not take money from your account. ;)
Enough about SM as the the longer i linger on the topic the more bad behaviors i see and usage of it that come from fear (not to say hate, which also comes from fear).
And like this we move to fear and i don't think i to much to write about it but it is a faded idea there deep in my mind. We all have been through experiences, childhood, teenage years, mature relationships. These all left a mark on our souls and behavior. So you see, i think that after each happening you have a small but hard choice to make, either you take the fearful approach and in order to protect yourself you will build walls and walls just to be sure that you will never get hurt again. I think you are missing one essential point here that destiny/life has it's own way and sooner or later with all your defenses you will repeat the same suffering or even bigger. And this is not about learning some weird lessons. Or you could walk in courage and better define what are you searching and only like this you might just might avoid the same suffering but funny enough a different one will come. I really think that in this life if you want happiness you must be willing to embrace suffering with courage. Running from suffering will only put you on a sure path towards it while being opened might help you avoid the same suffering and experience new ones but this ones i am so sure that they come with equally happiness. Just because someone acted in a certain way in our past and made us suffer we hide behind walls that we call boundaries screaming out loud that we learned our lesson. Don't you think that if you really learned your lesson you will know how to act in courage and not make any potential friend or emotional relationship go to a series of trials but the opposite you will make a better decision to start with and you will treat these new person with the clean slate that they disserve. This doesn't mean that you will not get hurt but it increases the chances not get hurt in the same manner or even worse to miss out on people that could be your people. You can call this FOMO but i call it giving a chance to good, good people, good happenings, good life.
Another note that found it's way here it's around something that happens so often, at least here in my country. He / she comes from a good family. 🤬🤬🤬 Or how to offend and seem like you are a high value person that surrounds itself with high values persons. But to better understand this let me share some realities:
- we are a virgin democracy
- in the 90's our society split between people who could steal, people who wanted to work, people who started building businesses. and people who started doing small trade
- well you see nobody got out of communism with money unless they were being an informer or already stealing and that's why we have a consistent class of people who started a business
Some were able to build sustainable business while others just made some money while others just struggled through those years. Years later in nowadays we have their kids which are referred to as coming from a good family just because their parents have money. If their parents were doctors, police or any other state function just try to imagine that for the first half of our democracy the main currency around here was bribe.
This bring me to my point how can we call today this former kids as coming from good families when there was no morals or care towards the social good ?
Around here society calls politicians as quality educated people while everyday you find out from media about their beginnings and how they faked their diplomas. Around here if you buy a Mercedes or BMW or Audi from the 2000's you are considered that you made it in life despite the ones who have any other car brand. Around here you are looked at as a successful person if you have an apartment but nobody looks/asks if that was bought with your own worked money or your parents money. Around here it's a habit to hire your kid or transfer him your business and afterwards they are called exceptional people although they were not able to land a job on their own or build something on their own.
And i am not talking about everybody but about the majority and how the rest of the people look at them. It's sad that we evaluate people based on what they have from their parents and not on what they were able to build, it's sad that we evaluate people on what they have and not on their morals and how thy act in society. In SM we venerate people that gather in high end places on their parents money and we refer to them as being quality people who come from good families.
And sadly so sadly at the end of the day you have good hard working people evaluated and labeled not based on who they are as humans but based on what their parents were able to accomplish financially not morally. So let's all agree that coming from a good family means a family from where you've got a good education, morals and love not material stuff. In order not to be misunderstood we have a few just few who got education, love and material possessions from their parents and build morals on their own and they must be respected for this.
Unfortunately this time it seems i am not closing with a positive vibe but hey there are some positive notes along the way.
P.S. this were small notes wrote in the last year while sitting alone enjoying a coffee and thinking about better days