I am coming now to an end to the first week without social media since social media appeared. I will not say that is bad and all that other crap. It's bad how we let it affect us, it's bad how we allow it to change our personalities, our principles, and our ways of thinking. It's bad that most people want to paint/post a perfect life but they don't want to show who they are and worse than this is how people are not realizing this and are starting to fantasize about fakes. Fairy tales are inspired by reality and they show only the beauty from those thru stories. Why because we need the perfect picture and to look at it as an objective and to strive for it every day. Here is the thin line reality sucks sometimes but we must try every day to achieve that fairytale, we will never make it but at least we will try to have a beautiful life. The problem today is that we have too many fairytales and we get scared of reality. What do we do when we get scared instead of learning and doing better, we hide and we get frustrated that our life is not so perfect like we see in this big flood of perfectly painted stories. I want a fairy tale and I promise myself that I will get there and yes I am a dreamer. Coming back to my social media break, usually, I am very active and post a lot so I wanted to see if what I've considered ok to post 1 week ago I still want to post it today. You may call it a self-education of my impulses.
The first impulse,
what to do with the time that was used for browsing social media? Read.
What to do with all the cool quotes, pictures, places, experiences, and so on that you want to share? Keep them there and see if you want to post them later on.
How will you know what are your friends doing? Call/text them.
How will you know what is your crush doing? get some courage and contact him/her
How will you know what is your ex up to? if you really want to know you will reach out and that means that you still care so you will figure something out. If not, then you really don't care.
How will you know what is happening in the world? Read some news.
And I really don't know what else are you using social media for, but really now, there are solutions to anything you want to do.
Personal results: discovered some shit about me and I really got the time to think about them as I should have, maybe a long time ago. But then again it's never too late or the right moment. It seems that now it was. I did some reading. I had more walks. All and all it's interesting.
Coming back to lesson nr 2...
Just for you to understand the above deviation regarding my social media break. People around me are making fun of me that I am posting to many quotes, well I found them interesting and I want to share them, who doesn't like it, unfollow, that easy. I heard it a few times that thru what I am posting people know when I am upset, stupid me forgot that I need to paint a perfect life. It's simple to unfollow, unfriend, i couldn't care less, it's not my objective to become an influencer and please everybody.
You are not here to be perfect, you are here to be a new best version of yourself every day, for the people you love.
You will make friends and you will lose friends, don't fall in the "we know each other since we were kids" trap. Just like romantic relationships you need to find the best ones for your soul, the ones for which you want to be a better person. Friends should help you evolve not keep you in the same place. Friends should tell you when you are stupid and to be there when you fall. It's an exchange. If you accept this process you will be able to make huge changes in your life, you will meet fantastic people and you will be another person with their support. Trust me when I am telling you that you will find the ones for your soul. As for the old ones they will be a part of your life forever but not in the same manner.
Relationships as in romantic ones, oooooo, they will be beautiful.
You will meet a lot of girls/boys and I am sure that the most important advice I can give you is to never mess with somebody's feelings.
With some of them, you will only exchange contact info and nothing more. With others, you will go for a coffee and stop there. With some of them, you will have meaningless sex. NOTE: always were protection, that shit kills. With some of them and just a few, you will think that you can build something but you will figure it out pretty fast and it's better to say stop. Never be selfish and stay somewhere because you are bored or scared to be lonely. Try to figure it out fast so that you don't hurt anybody, TRY.
With some you will fall in love, yes they will be more. Yes, the one exists and you will feel it. Maybe you will get absorbed and you will continue a relationship because you love her/him but life has a funny way to bring it to an end sooner or later in order to make some room for the one. Ugly note that nobody says in fairytales: you will realize this in some time not from the beginning, you will realize this after a few fights and it will burn like hell. Shitty note: you might be so stupid that you will lose her/him. You will suffer and you will abuse lesson 1, for a while you will feed your soul with the hope that what's meant to be it will be and eventually I think you will move on.
Funny little story: When I was a kid I worked as a guide in Turkey. And in my second year there a couple came and in their booking, it was written honeymoon. You can imagine that I already planned some cool stuff for them before their arrival. To my surprise, when I picked them up from the airport, they were pretty old (around 60). Struck by curiosity I booked an evening for me to spend it with them and to learn about their story. They were highschool lovers for a while but somehow it didn't work. Each one followed his steps, had a family, everything the full fairytale you might say, but independent. One day they met each other again at the market. Have in mind that since their romance they never talked again. After they met each other again after so many years they lost their second day in the park and decided that it's their time. They divorced and got married to each other.
So we might say that what's meant to be it will be although some efforts must be made, some hearts maybe will get broken, but never say never.
In each of your experiences, you will suffer, you will feel deceived and trust me when I am telling you that there is no shame in using lesson 1 and being vulnerable. Maybe some will laugh, others will laugh with their friends, others will think that you are crazy but you know what you will be you and you go to sleep with a full heart knowing that you showed your true colors. Maybe one will cheat you with a friend of yours, you will feel so bad and think that you are loosing 2 persons but actually, you will earn yourself a lot. You will understand this after a lot of tears. Maybe one will just cheat. Maybe another will lie. And the list can continue but you must listen to your heart even if it hurts even if people laugh. Your heart knows somehow when to stop.
The important thing here is to change. Don't think that you are perfect. Don't think that you are a good person and they are stupid because they lost you. Don't bury your head in the sand and complain that bad things happen to you. Try and understand why, analyze yourself, and see where did you make your share of mistakes. In a relationship, there are always 2 people and each one makes something that makes the other do something else and so on. If you don't find the middle it will end but not because of you or the other but because of you both. You each have your share of responsibility. Sometimes you will be lucky enough to realize where did you go wrong and fix it, other times it will be too late and it sucks. Because you could have done better and had an amazing time together or you might have kept the one next to you. again the shitty parts are that you can realize a big part of these things only after a while, most of the time.
What I am trying to say is that is very important to be opened, be you. The catch is that if you will be opened you with you and towards the others you will either have a shorter period with them but more beautiful or you will keep them forever. When I am saying this I am talking about friendships and relationships alike.
Tip: you will realize and change a lot of stuff about you when the right people are around while when the wrong people are around you will not learn anything and you will end up later on hurting the ones that are right. I know it sounds shitty but somehow this how it goes and I hope that you will be smarter and pay more attention so that you at least try and break the loop.
LEARN=CHANGE always, people change and you will change but you need to be you with you. Be you with you, real, honest, open, learn, change, be better. Never be scared to be vulnerable because the most important things are discovered when we are down not at the imaginary top.
Like Freddie Mercury said "Where Your Heart Like A Crown"
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