People are equally good and bad, the only difference is just what they want to give you more. And somehow it seems that it is written in the cells of most of them to offer hate instead of love and the worst of them all to respond to love with hate. Why? nobody knows and each one of them will be convinced that he/she is doing the right thing because otherwise, they couldn't live with themselves.
By the time you will appear into this world and be old enough to read your dad's notes, most probably thing will not change because this is who we are as humans. Important for you is to establish your own values and to try to live by them as much as possible although the surroundings will make it impossible for you.
Politicians will steal and lie because if you choose this career path the ones around you will change you. You might enter naively and with the will to do good among them but very soon you will find out that you are one and if you want to change something you need to play by their rules. The only hope is that generation by generation they will steal and deceive less than the ones before. This doesn't make them necessarily bad persons. They have families and friends that they love and to whom they are really good and nice. Some of them start with the desire to get rich while others with the desire to change things but will both end up doing the same sins. So the second category they are just weak persons who felt in the trap of the big machine and they don't have what it takes to stick to their dreams. You need to understand this and to forgive them but never forget what they are doing.
Along your life, you will have friends that will betray you the second they get a chance, and you will ask why? You need to forgive them and poison your soul because in the first place to start they were not your friends it was just a situation ( school, high school, work, and so on). Never judge yourself too harsh because we all believe in fairytales in a way or another but in real life, shit happens.
Let me tell you a short story about the first girl to whom I said: " I love you". We were teenagers and everything was just like in the movies. She was complaining that her father was a drunk and a cheater and that she thinks that all men (boys at that time) are the same. Guess how it all ended? I was faithful but like every couple (you will see) we had discussions and sometimes things were a drama. We were on a break and she decided to hook up with my oldest childhood friend. Little did I know at that time and although I was feeling betrayed I chose to forgive them both as we were on a break and people have different views on breaks ( I will explain some other time). It was something very short between them, 1 week and 5 kisses and it ended. Regarding my friend I decided to forgive him and to understand he was a jackass, not a friend, and distanced myself. Regarding her I forgave and we got back together believing the old textbook, he didn't mean anything and I realized that I want only you. A few months later without any heads up, she ran to the seaside with some friends and lost her virginity with a fucker in a one night stand. Forgive and forget as at that point It was clear that she didn't love me and it was stupid of me to poison my would with suffering hate for a person that chooses to deceive her in the first place and then me. Exactly what she was scared that somebody will do to her she was doing the others and from what I've heard she continued to have the same lifestyle for the many years that followed. I suffered and I never understood why she chose to act like that towards me but later on in my life I learned and understood that that was her emotional burden not mine and that at the end of the day we are all responsible for our actions and sufferings. At that moment and looking back I might say that she was a bad person while in reality, she had her problems this was the only way she knew how to deal with them.
You must understand the others, you must understand their real reasons, and only then you will be able to forgive and move on with scars but scars that don't need any fixing from the next person.
People choose to treat poorly other people because it is at hand, it comes natural and they don't have to waste time putting themselves in the other's position. You might say that they are selfish but in fact, they are just choosing the easy way. Don't we all want it easy?
At a certain point in life, I was hanging around with some very bad people for all the wrong reasons. At the same time, I entered in relation with the second girl that heard the magic words from me. The " friends" wanted to fuck me up really bad and they tried to break down the door of the house. My luck, it was a strong door. On the love side, she was cheating me constantly and she was always coming back crying that she made a mistake and she is sorry. It took a while to understand all the shit I got myself involved in but then I realized that it was all about my choices, my mistakes this time. I was to blind to see the reality that was right in front of me. The guys were 3 mentally deranged persons for whom everything was about violence and the signs were there for a long time that they don't like me but i ignored them as we were a big group a conflict would have been possible till I said that I am leaving the country for a while and people distance themselves from me and the occasion appeared for them. Regarding her, what to expect, I should have been attentive at how it all started. :) she was in a relationship with somebody else and she told me after 3 weeks. A person that starts a relationship while they are in another for sure they will try to do the same thing again. I was to blind to see and understand this. Later on, I understood she was scared of loneliness and on top, she was a nymphomaniac. Only when I understood their problems and realized that the signs were there I was able to forgive them and simply don't care anymore. Learned my lessons healed my scars and moved on with the same open heart as the first time. Because you see, it would be stupid to have hate in your heart for people when they are just like they are and it was only your mistake to get close to them. All of them till today are doing the same things so it wasn't something that was done intentionally to me.
By now you should realize the importance of understanding in the forgiveness process. Very important is that by understanding I am not saying that you need to invent excuses for people's shitty behavior towards you.
As you will get old people will hurt you in different ways, they will disappoint you in different ways.
They will cause exactly what they are doing. Hopefully, you will not be stupid like me and consume yourself at the unfairness of those accusations when you know exactly that they are the ones doing those things to you and you were never able to do it to them. People will put you on hold just because of their uncertainties and this will consume you but you will see that you are stronger than you think. People will make you feel bad because you are honest, they will attack you when you will ask them to be honest. They will judge you by how much money you have not by your soul and you will never be able to change that in those people. And yes they will hurt you in so many ways but forgive them all as we all have our path and you can get there only with a good heart, full of scars but at peace that you always listened to your heart,
Listen to your heart and when you say that you forgive, forgive and forget because if you bring it up again that will only make you a small person with pitty objectives in life. And most important you will hurt another person who believed you forgave them and love is about building not about waiting for the right moment to take revenge.
Strive every day to be good at forgiving.
Fall in love with the thorns so that you can truly love the rose.
Forgive what they've said and done as that's their problem,
Your problems are your actions towards other people and to make sure that you don't become them.
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